In today's modern world, it feels good when we find those who are in agreement with us. It gives a sense of validation when we believe others are on the "same page" as us, seeing things as we see them.
But if we don't agree them, does that mean that we are "in a totally different book" and not even close to being on the same page?
I don't think so.
A good friend of mine related the concept of "Agreements vs Alignment". In essence, the concept is based on the thought that as people, we are interested in the support of those who agree with us. Whether it's how we go about a certain project, live our lives, or a multitude of other things, the idea that others agree with us makes us feel good. The problem is, sometimes if others don't agree with us, it becomes a conflict for us. We have to be right, so they MUST agree with and believe everything that we believe.
A better way is alignment. Getting us all to agree on exactly the same thing is tough; getting us all aligned with the same thing is better. Alignment allows for room for people to be aligned in the same direction, but maybe with varying differences on how to get to the end result. It's like seeing the big picture of a project, realizing there are multiple ways to bring it to fruition.
Through this cooperative effort of alignment, we can improve our relationships with teammates, family, friends, co-workers and others while improving our ability to accomplish goals together.
Expecting someone to agree with us is not always sound, practical or even productive. Getting others aligned with us is a better way and can be productive in both our personal and professional lives.